When you were a Police Officer Did You Ever Get Shot, or Shoot Someone?
The Toll of Violence: Reflections on My Career as a Baltimore Police Officer
Recently, a fellow retired officer from the Baltimore Police Department posed a question on Facebook that stirred up a lot of memories for me. In the BPD Friends Facebook group, he asked how the violence we encountered on the job, whether we witnessed, experienced, or had to inflict it, affected us over time. That question hit close to home.
I've been retired from the force since February 28, 1992, having started my career on October 6, 1980. Reflecting on my time in uniform, the question made me pause and consider the impact those years had on me. It’s something I haven’t always wanted to face, but as I get older, I realize how deeply that part of my life still affects me, both physically and emotionally.
The Reality of Violence
During my years on the force, violence was a constant companion. The only moments in my career when it wasn’t a daily reality were during my early days in the Construction and Repair Unit and the Baltimore Police Academy. Once I hit the streets, violence became an unavoidable part of the job.
The cases blurred together after a while, murders, child abuse, domestic violence, elderly people hurt in senseless ways. Yet, a few incidents remain etched in my memory, surfacing at the most unexpected times.
I recall the tragic deaths I witnessed while off-duty, like the traffic accident where a car collided with the back of a tractor-trailer, or the horrific case of a three-year-old whose mother used lit cigarettes to burn the child as punishment. Another haunting memory is the man who, in his deep depression, covered himself in gasoline and set himself on fire. There was also the young prostitute, brutally stabbed and tossed down a flight of stairs like she was nothing more than garbage.
These incidents have never left me. They pop up when I least expect them, tugging at emotions I’ve tried to bury. Time has softened their impact, but the scars remain.
Encounters with Gunfire
But the violence wasn’t always something I just witnessed, it came at me directly. I found myself involved in four incidents where I was shot at, situations that today would be called "officer-involved shootings." In all of those cases, thankfully, everyone survived. Still, each one took its toll.
The first happened in the 3700 block of West Belvedere Avenue. I was backing up Auto Theft detectives following a stolen car. When the driver spotted me, they rammed my patrol car, and the passenger stuck a handgun out of the window, firing a shot. I wasn’t hit and didn’t return fire. The suspects lost control of the car, the handgun and were arrested without further incident. I was lucky that day.
In the second incident, I was working plainclothes with the Drug Enforcement Unit when we witnessed a drug deal go down. As we pursued the dealer, he fired one shot in my direction while running away. He fired a shot from under his left arm at me, while turned somewhat in my direct. Something fell from his hand and we later learned that it was a magazine from his weapon. I didn’t return fire, instead opting to chase him down. My partners and I arrested him after a short pursuit.
The third incident was the most intense. A suspect had murdered a man and had stolen his Corvette in Baltimore County, and the car was spotted on Oakley Avenue. Along with another sergeant, I was stationed nearby. When the suspect returned to the vehicle, a shootout ensued between him and the officers on the scene. He then sped towards us, firing his .45 caliber pistol through the car window. After ramming our patrol car head-on, he continued to fire. I gave chase on foot, returning fire with my department-issued .38 revolver. I ran up to him and tackled him as he fumbled with the weapon. I fired four rounds and later learned that I had hit him in the wrist, which led to his eventual capture. He’s still in prison, as far as I know.
The fourth shooting was the one that ended my career. I was following a stolen vehicle when the driver bailed out and made a grab for my revolver. We struggled for control of the weapon, and during the fight, all six rounds were discharged. By some miracle, neither of us was hit. However, the suspect's attempt to take my gun led to a fight that resulted in a serious injury to my right wrist.
What seemed like a simple sprain turned out to be much worse. Three surgeries and two steel plates later, my wrist was permanently damaged. At the age of 33, I was forced into early retirement, my right hand—the one I relied on as a right-handed officer—no longer fully functional.
The Aftermath
Looking back, I can see that my time on the force shaped me in ways I didn’t fully realize at first. The physical toll is obvious—I’m reminded of it every day when I look at my wrist—but the emotional effects are more subtle. The intensity of my memories has faded over time, but they are never far from the surface. The violence I encountered affected me, and it’s something I’ll carry with me for the rest of my life.
I’m proud of the service I gave and the brave officers I worked alongside. Policing in Baltimore during those years was tough, and it tested every officer in ways only those who’ve been there can truly understand. The job had its costs, but I wouldn’t trade those years for anything. They made me who I am today.
John Jay Wiley is a retired Police Sergeant and the host of the nationally syndicated Law Enforcement Talk Radio Show and podcast, you can listen to podcast episodes for free on their website, Apple Podcasts, Spotify or most major podcast platforms. You can stay updated about his story and many others simply by following us on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn and most all social media platforms.
Attributions
Officer Down Memorial Page (ODMP)
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